This morning I reminded my husband(jokingly) how lucky was he to have me in his life and to that he noded, with the sardonic smile leaving his face. The smile said it all 😉
Also recently, I met a friend who was all miserable- she felt all her hard work went unnoticed. She said there was no reciprocation and nobody loved her as much as she did. And this continued till I acknowledged what she went through and only then did we end the topic.
I believe we all might have felt this at one time or another that we are doing more than what is required. But if you look at it closely, we need others more than they need us, don’t we?
Besides we need someone to certify our actions. I struggle with this myself and this is the most horrible thing that we can put ourselves through. A consenting nod, an acknowledging smile, appreciating our benefaction, a warm hug(& the list is endless). It is not just begging for somebody’s attention but the worse is looking for constant approval. This is a dangerous disease in itself. Although, consciously being aware of these is a step towards finding a cure for such pining.
I truly think we commit to something only if we need a certain kind of environment. Rather than complaining about getting a raw deal, think why are we doing it when we know the ROI is low or none. That is the question that we need to ask.
Why do we feel so incomplete? Can someone really complete us? What is in us that is seeking this? Is that us? Is there a cure?
Arjuna had a similar question and Bhagavad Gita, Chapter 6, 35 prescribes the cure. And how we go about it? Maybe in the next blogpost…
Chañchalaṁ hi manaḥ kṛiṣhṇa pramāthi balavad dṛiḍham
tasyāhaṁ nigrahaṁ manye vāyor iva su-duṣhkaram// 34
The mind is very restless, turbulent, strong and obstinate, O Krishna. It appears to me that it is more difficult to control than the wind.
śhrī bhagavān uvācha
Asanśhayaṁ mahā-bāho mano durnigrahaṁ chalam
abhyāsena tu kaunteya vairāgyeṇa cha gṛihyate// 35
Lord Krishna said:
O mighty-armed son of Kunti, what you say is correct; the mind is indeed very difficult to restrain. But by practice and detachment, it can be controlled.